Friday, April 27, 2007

Ph.D. in Leadership


Short Course:


Make a short list of all things done to you that you abhorred.

Don't do them to others. Ever.


Make another list of things done to you that you loved.

Do them to others. Always."


Dee Hock

42 comments:

Talking Bear said...

I must admit that some of the things I abhorred were good for me in the long run. This creates a paradox that is extremely hard to reconcile. Just because I did not like it does not mean it was not good for me.

Peajay said...

But would you do to others that which you abhorred having done to yourself?

Talking Bear said...

If I thought they would benefit from it, yes. But that is the question, most of us do not like change, in fact we often abhore the process needed to create positive change. Some storms are the best thing that could have happened to us. But if it is an act committed out of malice, now that is a diffrent thing.

Peajay said...

I agree with the last comment but cannot agree that something which you would find abhorrent might be any less repulsive to inflict on someone else, how would you justify that it could be for their own good?

Talking Bear said...

I guess it all is how one looks at the situation. An unmature boy does not see that which a mature male sees and values. Learning how to make life defining choices in a split second and acting on those choices is not something young men learn easy or enjoyably. The ability to deny your own needs to insure the needs of others are met is another hard lesson. The learning process is burtal, harsh, cold, and sometime down right demeaning, but in the end the means are justified and a man is born.

Peajay said...

I guess we'll have to agree to disagree on this one TB. It seems that the end justifies the means whoever it hurts in the process.

anna said...

Actually ... I have a tendency to agree with TB... here.. Things that may have seemed harsh in our youth were really only laying the foundations for us to be responsible adults.

Self-discipline is something we all need to learn and often the lessons that teach it to us may seem abhorrent at the time.

I think at present we are losing the battle in our society and that is because people are too liberal and lax .... which is why we see the breakdown in law and order, the rise in petty crime and the lack of basic good manners in many young and not so young people.

Maybe, there's a bit too much lets be nice to everyone and some people are just taking advantage of that attitude and of well-meaning people in general.

Peajay said...

I fully recognise all that you say about the attitudes of so many these days. I wasn't subscribing to the lets be nice attitude but I just wondered where you drew the line. If you were caned should you cane. If you were thumped should you thump. As I asked before, is it the best course to repeat that which was repulsive to you.

Talking Bear said...

I guess if you look back and still see that some action that was done to you had no positive merit, than no, you should not repaet it period. Maybe hind sight should be the measure, was there learning? was it over all a growing period? Did I gain from the labor? Hind sight is they only way to tell. So if the event was abhorent and there was no positive outcome then it should be left in the past and not repeated.

Talking Bear said...

Oh, and thanks Anna for the pat on the back, although it sounded as if it pained you to do so...LOL. I am not that bad of a guy that it should be so hard to agree with....??

anna said...

Sorry if it came over like that TB... .reading back I can see you might have taken it like that, but I did agree with what you said and I understood, exactly what you meant :)

Don't be hurt..... sweetie:D

Peajay.... I wasn't endorsing physical punishment... I have never had that done to me and I would never do it to my child or anyone else's.

There are better ways of encouraging and teaching good manners, respect for oneself and other people and self discipline and compassion.

Children do rebel against what adults tell them, and sometimes at the time the lesson may seem harsh to them and go against what they want to do. I rebelled against my parents, as lots of young people do. But if we want a decent society and not anarchy then the lesson must be taught and learnt.

Talking Bear said...

Anna, no matter, even if you did, it is no sweat. I was teasing you just a bit. I wish you would give more input on some of these little sessions. I have a very thick skin, after all I married an English bred woman who is always at it. She will tell you she has met more than her match.....hehehe

anna said...

I'll try and visit more often TB

I like to have chat but I always prefer it when its tempered with a sense of humour ... which you seem to have :)

anna said...

Peajay

I see what you mean about your weather pixie ... its the middle of the night and 8C and she's standing about in the street (I presume) with hardly any clothes on.

She looks like a member of the oldest profession :D

Talking Bear said...

Yea, but I keep coming back to take another peek at her, heheheh

Melanie said...

I am a witness, the weather pixie has a long sleeve shirt and jeans on...too bad the SgtMjr is out at a friend's house, havin some beers and playing pool.
...Hey, that sure does beat a sewing circle!! Come on gals, go get yer pool cues!!!

anna said...

She's got a nice yellow frock on now..... and platform shoes...

She's certainly got the most clothes so far:)

AJ Fife said...

I'll ask the Fluffer where one can obtain suitable weather girl thingys for the red blooded male;)!!!

Jist a fleeting visit Peajay....I was on my way to check my hotmail account............

Melanie said...

...would that be for the red-blooded male to wear under his kilt, AJ??!! Are you and the SgtMjy in cahoots, now??!!
Hmmm, I wonder, will that entice the thermostat upward??!!
Can't wait to see what the weather pixie will do then! ;)
ah...so many questions to be answered, so little time!!! ;))

Peajay said...

She's starting to feel a little ogled!! :D As for the accusation of being a 'lady of the night' that was a bit harsh! :D

anna said...

Well, I'm sorry Peajay.... but if she dresses like that in the middle of the night, it was a little nippy as well, and stands in that provocative way.... you can see how I leapt to that conclusion. :D

I wonder if they go to sleep when we're not watching them....

Like in Toy Story when all the toys come alive when the humans are out of the way!! :D

Maybe, she goes to visit the other Weather Pixies....bet they don't leave their fellas alone with her!!! :D

Peajay said...

She does look like she's willing to forget all cold fronts or cumulonimbus in favour of a romp with a blokey Weather Pixie!! :D

Peajay said...

I just noticed that she actually has less on at 12 degrees C than she did this avo at 20 degrees C. I may have to think about having a Weather Blokey.

Melanie said...

well, she has cute pink and white nite time gear on...and that look....it's almost as if she's sayin....'take me to bed, or lose me forever'
...where's the weather blokey to 'show her the way home!' :D

AJ Fife said...

Hmmmmmm.....I like the weathergirl.....is her belly button pierced?

Peajay said...

I'm sorry AJ I don't know, but it does look a bit like it is. She looks the type to have had that done, lets hope that was all. :D

AJ Fife said...

Never understood or experienced the other 'bits' getting done!! What happens when you catch the piercing on something?:))

Peajay said...

Either it heightens the experience or it is exceptionally, eyewateringly painful depending on where the piercing is and what you catch it on! :D

Melanie said...

Oh, gosh, another man to be found on your blog...ah well, here goes....

Hi Peajay,

computers, are like men I think...they seem like they'd be easy to manage, but then it's oh no, what's the instruction manual say about that!!!...I wish it could be just 'plug in and play'!! ;D

Peajay said...

I thought TB lived to that motto all the time. He appears to have ideas about plug-n-playing with my weather gal, except she's an untouched little thing who's looking for someone younger. ;D

Anonymous said...

Give me a break, any woman who dresses like that is NOT untouched.

Peajay said...

You know the old adage of not judging a book by its cover. After all I'd never have thought you'd have been a 'small, tight little red thing' type TB! :D

melanie said...

Peajay, maybe he wants to get a cape to match?!! You know how I like costumes!!! ;D

He thought AJ had his priorities right tonite...no blogging, just saving his energy to see to his Mrs...of course that's not exactly how he said it!! :D

Peajay said...

Do you mean that TB is such a super hero that he wears his 'small, tight little red thing' outside of his trousers (pants)!

Talking Bear said...

Wel, hello my lovelies from Chicago. They are call for a very dry day here, the humidity will only be 40%. It took me as long to fly from LA to here as it did from London to LA. Yesterday was by far my worse day ever flying. Anyway, I wore my super underclothes to help keep me safe and to tease Mel.

Peajay said...

Are but did you wear them inside or outside? It makes a diference you know. I heard about your flying experience and your sweet comment concerning your luggage. You are so in for it when you get back!!! :D

Melanie said...

Peajay, yer weather pixie looks smashin tonite....Dave from Barra assured me the root of that word is gaelic from Is maith sin!!! ;)

Hello, TB....which pair of knickers did you wear??? the gold and black ones to go with the bat phone, or the red, white and blue, silk ones??!!

I'll trade their dry- 40% humidity for our moist 8% humidity anyday!!!

Peajay said...

I cannot believe the pair of you are discussing TB's choice of smalls on my blog! Although in saying that considering the humidity perhaps going commando could be a possibility! Surely silk's gonna be real warm and clingy in places you don't want to be clung!

Melanie said...

yeh, but at least I didn't start the trouble (this time) ;D

run around a'naturrall, hmm...makes fir a mighty bad sunburn hazard!!!

Melanie said...

true, talkin about the pants fer the package probably should be taken elsewhere....

...did I tell you about how TB talked the stewardress inta givin him free drinks...all tha way ta Chicagy??!!!

maybee I'll leave that fir him ta tell ya!!! ;))

Peajay said...

I shall await, with anticipation, to learn just how TB managed that one. Is it something lewd, or did the poor girl just stand no chance against his charismatic charm and wit.

Talking Bear said...

The trip to Chicago was a blast. I sat down in my assigned seat and to my suprise, a face i know sat next to me. A very friendly fellow. We chatted for some time. The stwerdess asked me if I was with him, and of course I said yes, I am his security agent while traveling, heheheh. Anyway, I got free drinks out of the whole mix up. I was sure to let the lovely airlines lady know that "our" movie opened up on May 25th and she should go because it had some twists. Anyway, jonny and I had a blast swaping stories, Savvy....